Worst Idea Award
Tom: It's a Jump to Conclusions Mat. You see... You have this mat with different CONCLUSIONS written on it that you could JUMP TO.

Straight-Shooter Award
Peter: You see Bob, it's not that I'm lazy it's that I just don't care.

Honesty Award
Peter: Well, I generally come in at least fifteen minutes late. I use the side door that way Lumbergh can't see me. After that I sorta space out for an hour.

Peter: Good luck with your layoffs all right? I hope your firings go really, really well.

Peter: Lumbergh's gonna have me work on Saturday. I can tell already. I'm gonna end up doing it because I'm a big pussy.

Joanna: How dare you judge me? Look at you. You're just some penny-stealing, criminal man!

Lawrence: Hey Peter man, check out channel 9, it's the breast exams.

Brian: Sounds like a case of the Mondays.

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